Let me start by stating the obvious: starting 2024 with a Breast Cancer diagnosis was not in my plans, although deep down, I knew something more serious was going on.
It was January 22, around 5:30 pm, when I got the call from my doctor, who broke the news to me in a heavy voice. I was surprisingly pleasant during the call, but the room was spinning, my heart was racing, and I had tunnel vision. I recall thinking I had to ‘get it together’ as my daughter would be home any minute, and I needed time to process this diagnosis. She returned home, and I managed to hold a poker face for the entire night until she went to bed.
Sign up for stories about health and healing from Sea to Sky Healer
The weeks following that call were intense, with consultations with surgeons, big decisions to make, and little time to process feelings. I felt like I was caught up in the middle of a storm. Sharing the news with parents, brothers, my partner, and my sweet daughter broke my heart in a thousand pieces. I saw myself trying to make everyone around me feel better. Surprisingly, I was either dealing with it well or skillfully suppressing my intense fear and anxiety, but regardless, I was somehow OK.
After a couple of weeks, sharing the news with people around me got to me, and I could see that I was overwhelmed, afraid, and exhausted. I could feel the intensity of it all in my body, and having some knowledge of the nervous system came in handy. I knew what I had to do.
As a counsellor, I spend my days supporting people by getting to know their bodies and learning how to bring them back into regulation. Well, now it was time to connect with my body, emotions, and breath. It was time for me to practice what I preach. Easier said than done, right?
My healing journey has barely begun, but my overall experience has been positive. I don’t mean to diminish the negative aspect of it, but I had to find the positive in all of this. This experience has shown me how loved and supported I am, the power of connection, and the humanity in all of us. I know things will worsen before they improve, but knowing I have people in my corner keeps me going with a big smile.
My heart is exploding with love and gratitude, and I hope I can one day be in someone else’s corner, too. I will end with this: life is short, beautiful, sweet and extremely challenging. Pick your battles, let go of what doesn’t serve you, hug more, laugh more, go out in nature and take a deep breath in the middle of the woods. Smile and feel the love in your heart!
Raquel is a local counsellor, mom, and lover of pleasant gatherings with people in this community. She has lived in Squamish for nine years. Her friends have recently started a fundraiser for her.
Comments
NOTE: The Sea to Sky Healer welcomes your opinions and comments. We do not allow personal attacks, offensive language or unsubstantiated allegations. We reserve the right to edit comments for length, style, legality and taste and reproduce them in print, electronic or otherwise. For further information, please contact the editor or publisher, or see our Terms and Conditions.